Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Weighing In

Here it is Wednesday already and time for a weigh in to honor my committment to My Long Hot Active Summer Challenge.  Since I have been trying mindful eating over the last couple of weeks, I had no idea, really what to expect.  But I wasn't afraid because no matter what, I am truly enjoying this new way of approaching food.  My stress levels have dropped a whole lot for sure.  It's hard to explain other than to say I just don't constantly think or worry about food.  I eat whatever, whenever and it's working out pretty well.  I am eating things that I haven't had in a long, long time, like the BLT I had for lunch while on staycation. My sensory satisfaction level has been so high that after I eat, I really don't think about food at all again until I start getting "hungry" signals from my body.  The other thing I've noticed is that I'm not craving sweets as much.  I swear some of the eating I was doing was simply because I had more calories "left" or because I was looking for satisfaction I couldn't find in the bland choices I was making.

The only exception to this was Monday when I came back to work and that was more of wanting to chew or something to alleviate the boredom.  I chewed a lot of gum on Monday.  Yesterday, I was busier at work and found myself back to not thinking about food.  So far, so good - at least for me!


That weight is down 1.6 pounds from the last time I blogged about weigh in.  Last Wednesday I had lost .6 (but wasn't posting, I just reported to my challenge thread) so this is another pound down in the the last week. Huh.  The downward trend is one I'm liking and hope keeps up, thyroid willing.

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I wanted to respond to a couple of the comments I got yesterday regarding my upcoming race.  I know some folks don't read all the time or are just finding this blog so maybe it's not clear that I have been running for 8 years and racing on and off for 7.  I am quite aware of the satisfaction of just getting a race done.  HOWEVER, when one is an experienced runner/racer, you have a yearning to do more than just finish.  In fact,  it's very normal to want to do better and run faster in your races.  As I thought about what I wrote and some of the comments, I realized that perhaps I did know my times were slowing down.  Much of it is weight related and I know that too.  As soon as I can figure out how to shake the extra weight, I'll let you know.  In the meantime, I'm running with extra weight which makes me slower, no matter how much I train.  In 2008, I think in knew in the far reaches of my mind that the slower times were going to mess with me so I stopped racing.  This race in August will the the first I've done since October of 2008.  While I have never expected it to be my best, I really was hoping it wouldn't be my worst.  But, in may be, and I've got to work through that mentally.  The one thing I know for sure, especially once you get into any distance racing, is that a huge percentage of the race is mental - breaking through when your left brain starts telling you that you suck and you can't run.  So I've got to get my head wrapped around reality and then I'll be ok and be able to do just what Roxie suggested, which is to have fun with it!

I also suspect that I'm probably doing what Mr. Helen accuses me of all the time:  being harder on myself than anyone else ever would be.  I can't even begin to tell you how many times he and I have gotten into arguments on the way home from Muay Thai Boxing because I am thrashing myself for screwing up combinations or not being able to remember a weapon form or something along those lines.  Too many expectations, especially the whole expecting perfection thing.  I've let that sort of pressure stop me from participating in too many things in my life and it's definitely one of the things I have noticed (uh, maybe because he keeps pointing it out) and been working on this year.

On the other hand,  I hold my first races to near and dear to my heart because I had absolutely no expectations and was able to just go run.  Any time, any new distance was a personal best.  Now that is fun!

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Another comment that struck me was Leslie's who agreed with me about the camping thing then stated that she has started upgrading to business class on flights when she can.  What a great idea!  I can't believe I've never thought of that!

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Do you do anything nice for yourself?  I mean something that is just for you and not related to your weight or as a reward?  When I turned 40 I was given a large gift certificate to the salon where I get my hair done.  I decided to not use it for hair but started getting a manicure every 2 weeks.  The gift certificate ran out and I enjoyed it so much, I kept going.  Ten years later I am still doing it. Every once in a while I throw a pedicure in there. It's just for me.  I'm worth it.



14 comments:

  1. I forgot to mention about my camping yesterday - I agree it isn't for everyone but the trailer I camp in is probably better than some hotel rooms so I don't really call it roughing it anymore. Tents are for the kids, I'm not into that anymore. But even without service, our trailer is pretty comfy :)

    Thanks for all your support yesterday. It's why I love my bloggy friends as you knocked me out of my funk. I had a good workout last night because of it.

    I do the pedicures, as well as the nails. I have to do stuff for me cause rarely does anyone else and I deserve it :)
    Have a great day Helen - oh and great job on the weight loss. I'm afraid to weigh right now so I'm not. And great job on the mindful eating... I'm not having very much success at it right now but I think it's because of stress eating and mindful eating are kind of contradicting each other right now ... I'm learning.

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  2. YES! :-)

    And I hate camping.

    And here's to relaxing and enjoying ourselves and not being so damned hard on us!

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  3. Way to go with the eating and the loss. The freedom from food obsession is even better than the loss, I would think.

    Hear! Hear! On the relaxing, enjoying ourselves and not being our own worst critics!

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  4. "I am quite aware of the satisfaction of just getting a race done. HOWEVER, when one is an experienced runner/racer, you have a yearning to do more than just finish. "

    I can SO relate to that! At my first 5k, I was happy to just finish. At my first 10k, I was just happy to finish. Now that I am training for a half marathon I want to finish, but I want to finish STRONG and don't blame you for wanting the same. It is perfectly normal to want to see progress...and I hope you do!

    Congrats on your loss!

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  5. You're right; you are worth being pampered!!! By the way, you said something in your blog that totally reminds me of me. It was the part about being hungry because you still had points left. SERIOUSLY?!?! I thought that I was the only one that did this. Eeek...we're twins :)

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  6. You bet your a$$ you're worth it!

    I used to run, though never a marathon or even a half, but being obsessive, I always felt I had to run at least as far as the day before, prefereable at least 1/4 mile more. I get it - you've performed at high levels, so "having fun with it" is harder. But doable! I have fun walking now!

    Re: the upgrade to business...the first time I did this was in 2008 when I'd flown to Atlanta to walk a half marathon with my daughter. We had a great time, finished fine, but mom was tired and my legs were sore the next day. Wouldn't you know the flights were messed up out of Atlanta the next day, so I had to sit in the airport for 10 hours before getting on a plane, only to see that I was in the back of a loooong plane and in the center seat. Shoot me now! So I asked if there were any other seats, and they said only the upgrade for $40 extra. SOLD. I couldn't believe the additionaly leg room, comfort, and calm. I've always known I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, even though my family didn't know it!

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  7. You definitely deserve it my friend!

    I too used to be in the "all or nothing category." If I ate one thing I thought was "wrong" or not on my "diet" that would set me into eating everything in sight for two weeks. Then I'd be "back on" and start all over. I wonder how I got to be 210 pounds!

    I love the way you are eating! I think you appreciate the food more this way, how it tastes and I agree without thinking "hey I have 300 calories left the day" you just stop because you are done.

    You are doing great!

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  8. Congrats on a great loss for the week! Very exciting. And the freedom from food obsession is awesome. Way to go. Keep up all the good work. :)

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  9. Great weight loss. To keep thoughts of food out of your brain is a major accomplishment. Keep up the great work and the healthy thinking.

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  10. Thanks for this post, definately a lot I can relate to and I am thinking through this mindful eating thing. I like how you talk about fighting your mind through the race and your thought process through running as well as about the mindful eating/food obsession thing.

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  11. I think it is SO GREAT that you are finding success and contentment with mindful eating. We've gotten so far away from it, but once you get going you realize how natural it is. You're inspiring me to try it again!

    Also, I think the best thing you can do for yourself to prepare for a race is to set goals and challenges for yourself. Since you are an experienced runner, setting a more defined goal than "god, please let me just finish" (my usual goal) is a smart idea.

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