Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Tuesday Ten

1.  The holidays are upon us.  I know this because the Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas candy is out in all the stores already.

2.  Speaking of candy, Splurgie is doing her No Halloween Candy pledge again this year.  Turns out her idea of "Fun Size" is being able to fit into a great pair of jeans.  How about that.

3.  I want to love the holidays, in fact, I think I really did used to love the holidays, but each year I'm finding them more stressful and exhausting, therefore I've begun to dread them. I want to change that way of thinking but I'm finding hard to focus on "fun" and "family."

4.  Both extended families live nearby and there is always the tug, tug, tug to get us to come in their direction.  Each family has also had some really bad, hard stuff go down over the last couple of years, so if we choose the tug of one over the tug of the other, one or the other is serving up big portions of a guilt platter.

5.  Which means that we end up running around like lunatics trying to get to everything.  Like I said, exhausting.

6.  I'm really not looking forward to Christmas at all this year because Pam's ashes are going to be scattered.  I'm finding that I so want this to be OVER.  I want to move on.

7.  Mr. Helen mentioned that he wants to try to get his son/my stepson to come for Christmas, mostly I think, because it should will be the final goodbye to Pam and Little Mr. Helen did not go to either of the memorial services.

8.  It's a super long story, that I won't go into here, but suffice it to say my stepson is 29 going on 12.  Our relationship (and yes, I include Mr. Helen) with him is tenuous at best.  So while in my head I know that Mr. Helen needs to see him (emotionally and spiritually - it's his son for goodness sake!), I dread it.  It will be stressful no matter what.

9.  Right about this time each year I begin to think:  If I really buckle down, and really behave myself, and really make good choices about my food and exercise, I might be able to be the thinnest I've ever been for the Holidays! I might even let people take pictures of me!

10.  Exhausting I tell ya.  Did I mention I'm sort of dreading the holidays?

17 comments:

  1. Thank you for visiting my blog and mentioning it. Yes, the holiday season is fraught with land mines. Having family related issues just adds to it. Probably it causes it! The past 2 years I made two changes (not food related) that made me enjoy the holidays again: (1) I swapped out the big labor-intensive tree (that only I decorated and put away ... do you sense any resentment there?)for a little twinkly pull-out-of-the-box number and (2) I cut the insanity of a little meaningless gift for all siblings and their spouses for a Pollyanna exchange. It's so much more fun to shop for one nice gift than a zillion gifts that nobody cherishes. The cost is about the same in the end but the time saves is enormous.

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  2. Oh boy! We could have a therapy session on 1-10.
    What if we remembered that "the holidays" are just another day?
    Another day to make healthy choices, another day to run, another day to hug the ones we really love?
    I say WE because I am with you sista'!!!!!!

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  3. Helen, you are so beautifully photogenic, people can take photos of you any time! Are you not participating in the Hot 100 this year?

    Either way, you know I am rooting for you! LOVING your virtual runs with Shelley, wow, such a cool idea!

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  4. Sing it, Helen. Holidays are so stressful!

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  5. I'm not EVEN going to think about the holidays yet. LA LA LA, fingers in ears...

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  6. I'm feeling the same way about the holidays. Bah humbug. I hate feeling like this but every year it's this big struggle, buying presents, decorating the house.

    Let's not forget the dreaded work party that I freaking hate. I skipped it last year and they're still talking about how I didn't show up for up for it. Like how dare I do such a thing...it was at my boss' house. I did not want to go so I didn't. So sue me.

    Anyway, your holiday does sounds like it might be a tad bit more stressful than mine. All I can say is that you'll live through it. What's that saying...That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger. ROFL. Yeah, right. Stupid saying. :)

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  7. I love this post mostly because we all have to pretend to like the holidays and they cause so much stress. Or if we act like 29 year olds going on 12, then they aren't so stressful. We can just be recipients of gifts and not have to buy any gifts and not have to cook or do anything.

    I'm pretty lucky - depending on one's definition of luck. All of the people in my life that I had to make choices to split my holidays up either died or they dumped me so I'm totally unencumbered that way.

    Spreading ashes around a holiday seems like asking for trouble. IMHO

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  8. Happy Holiday's Helen......... I do hope things go smooth for you during what can be a very stressful time of year

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  9. Hallmark makes it all look so good! Reality is a different story. We don't have any extended family living near us so our holidays are always quiet and peaceful, just the way I like them.

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  10. My mind just revolted: the holidays cannot be here already! Hmmm, maybe there's a more positive way to look at it; acknowledging them now before they are on top of us can give us the chance to be proactive about them. Like with Splurgie's No-Fun challenge. Hmmm!

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  11. I feel your pain...my mom died Dec 10, 2004 since then the holidays have been awful! brings tears to my eyes just typing it...I wish we could just skip the whole month...but alas we cannot so I remember the date quietly and get on with it.
    This year I hope the holidays will be less stress for all of us.

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  12. I feel stressed just reading your post. I think we can all relate especially if there are extended families involved. I am fortunate with Mr. Sandra as he only has his Mom and she tends to spend her holidays with us, and I only have my sister and brother and we always spend holidays together so there isn't too much pull there anymore. But the children are a different story. I used to stress out so much about trying to please everyone and now I just focus on what feels right and go that direction. Everyone else can deal without me for awhile. Happens when you end up being the Matriarch of the family (and I'm still so young). Holidays are hard! I'm with ya on that one.

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  13. Yep - I get the holiday guilt every single year and it seems I never can make everyone happy - which is my claim to fame - I end up making everyone else happy but myself!

    I'll be your fitness buddy - even though my clothes still fit the same, I feel fatter every day - not a good feeling! :(

    Hugs!

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  14. sorry to hear youre stressed going into the upcoming season. Maybe you could sit down and think of your best holiday memories, figure out what you like BEST about this time of year and then make sure that happens.

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  15. I totally understand what you mean. Growing up, we had no relatives near us, so it was just our family and we had awesome traditions and we loved every minute of it. I love having both sides of our family close, but in years past, it's been wake up early, go to church, run home, open presents, go to first family then 2nd family then home. It's so tiring! Sorry about the 29 going on 12, that one stinks!

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  16. Ahhh. Tuesday Ten, I have missed you so! Good to be back on the blog train. Thanks for stopping by to say hello, Miss Helen! xoxo

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  17. I always loved being me :) because we never really got much into the holidays (hanukkah isnt that big a deal and my mom was/is NOT a baker/cooker so thanksgiving wasnt that huge either)

    and
    then
    I
    got
    married.

    *cue dread*

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