2. Speaking of candy, Splurgie is doing her No Halloween Candy pledge again this year. Turns out her idea of "Fun Size" is being able to fit into a great pair of jeans. How about that.
3. I want to love the holidays, in fact, I think I really did used to love the holidays, but each year I'm finding them more stressful and exhausting, therefore I've begun to dread them. I want to change that way of thinking but I'm finding hard to focus on "fun" and "family."
4. Both extended families live nearby and there is always the tug, tug, tug to get us to come in their direction. Each family has also had some really bad, hard stuff go down over the last couple of years, so if we choose the tug of one over the tug of the other, one or the other is serving up big portions of a guilt platter.
5. Which means that we end up running around like lunatics trying to get to everything. Like I said, exhausting.
6. I'm really not looking forward to Christmas at all this year because Pam's ashes are going to be scattered. I'm finding that I so want this to be OVER. I want to move on.
7. Mr. Helen mentioned that he wants to try to get his son/my stepson to come for Christmas, mostly I think, because it
8. It's a super long story, that I won't go into here, but suffice it to say my stepson is 29 going on 12. Our relationship (and yes, I include Mr. Helen) with him is tenuous at best. So while in my head I know that Mr. Helen needs to see him (emotionally and spiritually - it's his son for goodness sake!), I dread it. It will be stressful no matter what.
9. Right about this time each year I begin to think: If I really buckle down, and really behave myself, and really make good choices about my food and exercise, I might be able to be the thinnest I've ever been for the Holidays! I might even let people take pictures of me!
10. Exhausting I tell ya. Did I mention I'm sort of dreading the holidays?