Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Fat Tuesday Ten

10.  Today is Fat Tuesday.  You go ahead and take that any way you want.

9.  I made this stir-fry from Cooking Light's March issue for our dinner.  It really is ready in 20 minutes and it's so yummy!  The only substitutions I made were using beef broth where it called for sherry, and using ground ginger instead of fresh (didn't have either of those ingredients).  I made Mr. Helen sticky rice and made brown rice for myself.  Supposed to serve 4 - but Mr. Helen ate 2 servings! This is an almost perfect "got to get something for dinner together quick" meal:

8.  Lunchtime errands and trips to New York City have one thing in common:  everything willl take longer than you thought it would.

7.  When I am provoked, I swear like a Marine.  The first time Mr. Helen and I ever got into an voracious verbal disagreement I think I shocked him into silence by the words coming out of my mouth.  I'm not proud of it and work hard to control it, but I promise I can make your grandmother blush.  This will be pertinent later in the ten.

6.  Saturday run in the city, true conversation #1: Guy dressed in a military uniform standing on a street corner with friends gives me two thumbs up as I run by and says, "Hey!! YOU GO GIRL!  I saw you waaaaay back there!"  My verbal response:  "Thanks!" My inner response: "Oh Yeah!"

5.  Everyone has their grammar irritation - you know what I mean -  there, their, or they're; loose weight or lose weight, etc. You know what's bugging the heck out of me lately because I keep seeing it in blogs and comments? Freely interchanging "Carbs" and "Junk Food." For example saying, I gained a bunch of weight because I ate so many carbs. No you didn't. You gained weight because you ate piss poor, or you ate too many calories, or maybe even because you have a medical issue. Carbs are not evil, people. Even vegetables have carbs.  It's irritating me so much I'm about to call people on it when I comment on their blogs.

4. Here's a photo of my birthday anemones opened up.  I'm putting this here for poor Lori and other friends who got another 2 feet of snow yesterday.  Oy! Did you know if you put these flowers in your refrigerator overnight, they last twice as long?

3. Lately, whenever I need a really good belly laugh, I go to Damn You Autocorrect.  If you haven't been there, whether you own an iPhone or not, you need to go.  It will cheer you up.  Seriously, it's so funny, I can't read it at work because it makes me belly laugh out loud.  Be warned some of it is at least PG-13.

2.  Saturday run in the city, true conversation #2:  Two guys crossing the road towards a Dunkin Donuts I happened to be running by point and then one of them says, "Look at that fat chick trying to run!" and then they laugh hysterically.  My verbal response: I stop dead in my tracks, turn around and yell, "Very funny.  At least I'm doing something, you lazy MFers!" Only I said the actual swear word, and then turned and took off running again. My inner response: "Good thing they kept walking otherwise I'd walk back there and roundhouse kick their stupid asses."

1.  From Bob Harper, during last week's episode of Biggest Loser:  Life will always, always be a struggle.  It's how you manage the struggle, how you go through it, how you deal with it, that will ultimately tell your story.


  1. I would have totally dropped the F bomb on those asshats. As we say here in the south - "some people".

  2. Okay, this is driving me nuts! Did you just correct a 'their' to a 'there' in #2 in the last few minutes? I was going to LOL over it with you.

    Because I loved #5--we need to incorporate on this one. It is driving me NUTS the way people talk about carbs. Yes, people, veggies have carbs too. And if you don't eat enough carbs you will soon be brain dead. Which maybe is your problem already.

    I do like what you said to those two guys. I would only say that inside my brain, I think. But I do think of those shocking responses sometimes.

    LOVE the Bob Harper quote.

    Love your Tuesday Ten!

  3. I have never been laughed at (that I know of) while running - YET. There are enough douchebags out there that I know my time is coming - I just hope I can handle it like you did, instead of with tears, which would be my usual MO. LOVE that you called them out! LOVE LOVE LOVE.

    Those grammar mistakes deeply wound the journalism major in me. And blaming a weight issue on too many carbs - that is funny. I guess I could phrase my current substantial belly on having eaten too many carbs, but really, it's too many M&M's - but hey, they contain carbs! ;)

    OK, Ima baby's go make my breakfast now.

  4. You rock for calling those asswipes out! I have endured more than my share over the years of dumbass remarks. I hate how they hurt, even though the namecallers are the ones with the problem.

    Can you tell that I am a swearing machine as well? I try very hard around my nieces and my mother, but poor John hears quite a bit of vocabulary. :D

    I don't like the lumping of carbs either. Fruit and veggies are carbs and when people say they eat low carb and refuse to eat fruit. A pear is not the same thing as a 100-calorie pack! Of course, it always is much easier to generalize than to take the time to specify.

  5. I'm glad you called those creeps the MF word. I can't believe people, in this day and age, STILL say mean things about people who are working out on the streets. RIDICULOUS! Grrrr!

    You RULE! I love that you're rockin' it in public. You're so much braver than me! GO, GIRL!!!!

  6. Another reason why I like you so much Helen - I swear like a drunken sailor too! I would have said the same thing to those guys - kudos!!

    My pet peeve is that people send me emails asking how I can eat sugar if I am diabetic - really?

    Your stir fry looks delicious - I hate sherry too, so the beef broth is a good substitute :D

  7. Man I would have kicked those MF'ers a donut in their back! So inpolite, it makes me angry.

    I guess my English makes you laugh sometimes too but I've got an excuse: it's not my native language :) But I do what you mean. If see how kids write Dutch nowadays, unbelievable. Seems like they don't learn Dutch anymore at school, it's really horrible.

    The hub says I swear too often too but I disagree on that LOL

  8. My daughter and I were out walking one day (quite some time ago) and some dude (street bum type) rode by on his bike and made some pretty derogatory remark about our size. My response was "well at least we can lose weight, but you sure can't fix stupid". I know it is an old saying .. can't fix stupid ... but it made me feel better just staying it :)


    I don't swear myself, but my sister would make any army trooper proud. Maybe that's why I don't - she had it covered for both of us....

  9. Surely they weren't talking about you. Do they know that you run half marathons? Can they do that? Do they know that you kick ass? They almost found out. Jerks. Why are some people so mean? Probably because they have their own insecurities and they think that if they can put someone else down then they will be built up.

    Love the autocorrect site. I was laughing so hard that I was crying when I first saw it. Even spark people food log has some weird auto crrects. nonfat milk=nonlethal milk. LOL

    HUGS Don't worry about big people with small minds. You are amazing.

  10. That site is great! I could add a few of my own!

    Who knew you swore like a sailor! Glad to know I am not the only one!

    Those dudes are asshats. I would have done the same F**kin thing!

  11. I love your stir fry! I didn't always make brown rice (takes a little planning ahead) but I really like it now. My favorite Chinese restaurant offers it as an alternative too.

    I can't explain why I can't utter the f-bomb (or any version of it) out loud. I couldn't use it in anger - I'd laugh at myself trying to blurt it out without my voice cracking in horror. Believe me, no one around me seems to have the same problem. But the guys who yelled to you really deserved it. You go, girl!

  12. Oh, Helen - you're such an awesome lady - curse words and all.
    And I know what you mean about the misspelling/misuse of words lately - Please, please call me out if I do that (I need someone who's got my back). I liken it to the equivalent of being told that there's toilet paper stuck to my shoe - I just NEED to know these things for my own good!

  13. Oh my God. I can't believe people actually say things like that outloud. Not what YOU said, but what those dudes said! I'm proud of you. You, and your dirty words. PROUD.

  14. Don't think twice about those guys Helen - you are awesome!

    I can swear pretty bad too sometimes - it's all good though!

  15. They did NOT say that f-ing comment. I am burning up. Mostly because YOU ARE NOT A FAT CHIC, nor are you trying to run, you are freakin' running. Seriously, what the hell? My mouth is trash as you can tell and I am furious.
    Had other things to say, but this one took me for a loop, oh, that recipe looks delish, and I don't eat beef, they did NOT say that, love the auto correct, almost wet my pants reading it, I can't believe those PIGS!, and they were going to Donuts.......
    Love the flowers.

  16. OMG (as the kids never really said) that damn you autocorrect is too funny!! and my life :)

    Ive accidentally sent out some odd odd tweets.

  17. SERIOUSLY??? I'm so proud of you though. I would have done the same thing and have been known too. Thank you SO much for all your support. It means A LOT!!!!

  18. Way to go calling out those TOOLS on the street!!! Karma will come back and bite 'em!
    Love this post! You so hit the nail on the head MANY times. Have a great day!!!

  19. I can't believe people said that to you. I am stunned. I was once riding a bike and my ass enveloped the seat and someone had the nerve to ask where the seat was. They found out PDQ when I shoved it up their ass.

    I have to go visit the autocorrect.
    Dinner looks yummy.
    Thanks for the birthday greetings today. Made me feel happy.

  20. Oh my goodness how can adults behave like children and feel good about it? Morons!

  21. Cracking up!!! LOVE that you let them know what jackwagons they are!