The issue for me with a detox is that it's boring. It's the same food day in and day out and while I can do that for a bit, it's just not sustainable for the long term. By day 3, as in the last time I did this, I wanted to throw my hands up in the air and
One of the things I like about doing this reset is that it also seems to reset my mind - almost like a fog clears - and reset my hunger signals. The plain facts are, if you're eating only 6 oz. of chicken or fish and lots and lots of vegetables every day, you will feel hunger. You just will. So that's a good thing.
I actually managed to lose all the weight I'd gained over the weeks of working with the nutritionist but it didn't feel like a victory of any sort, just a "been there, done that" feeling. Nothing to celebrate because I still haven't gotten past (or below) where I started.
All of this has had me thinking, a lot, about food. Not in an obsessive way but more of analyzing why one way of eating seems to work better for me while Mr. Helen or my girlfriend can eat very different things and are not affected in the same way that I am.
I think one of the reasons I get so annoyed with people declaring foods are "bad" is because food is not inherently bad. For example, I made my Mexican Quinoa Stuffed Peppers for lunches this week and just after I finished, I was surfing Facebook and a friend posted that she was looking for good quinoa recipes. So I told her about my peppers and another cold quinoa salad. She asked me to share and I bluntly told her that I was hesitant because she is an Isagenix queen (it's one of those 2 shakes and a strict list of foods programs). She insisted that it would be fine. So I share and her immediate comment was they looked delicious and that the "only" bad things in the recipe were the corn and the cheese (mind you it's 1/2 cup of corn and 1/2 cup of 2% cheese for four peppers). I just couldn't let that remark go and told her that those foods were not "bad" and thinking like that is what gets most of us in trouble with food.
Over the years I've tried just about everything under the sun so that gives me some pretty good information about myself: I like variety. It's not even that I will necessarily choose all sorts of variety from day to day, but the minute you start telling me I "can't have" something and there's no medical/health reason to back that up, inside I become like a 2 year old throwing a full on tantrum and screaming NOOOOOOO!!!
So again, I'm brought back to the place of wanting and needing to figure out how to eat to allow me to reach my health goals. All during detox week I kept wishing I could have pasta or sweet potato instead of that damnable 1/2 cup of brown rice allotted every day (I was so tired of it, I didn't eat any rice the last day lol!). But here's a funny: it's a new week and I still haven't had those things. It's simply the fact that I can if I want to.
I have to admit, I'm a bit frustrated with the nutritionist at this point. She hasn't really helped or done what I thought she would. It was ME insisting that I stop eating at her macro percentages that put a halt to the weight gain. I mean, how many weeks in a row did I have to gain before she changed something? When she fluffed it off the last time, that was when I stomped my foot and said no more! I reminded her that the reason I agreed to work with her was that she was supposed to be helping me find the right formula and that while she had given me something to start with, we were 8 weeks in, I'd gained weight, and she hadn't changed a thing! I think I was right to feel frustration and to do my own reset/detox.
Then, to top it off, she was so excited about the weight I lost doing the detox she wanted me to continue it for another week. This was after I specifically told her I was doing it for one week only, knowing from my past experience that it's not sustainable. I repeated that sentiment in the detox notes I sent her and reiterated that I'm searching for a way of eating that will allow me to live without stress over food, lose some weight, then maintain that in the future. She then asked me "so what do you want to do?" Sigh.
Here's to hoping I can figure that out sooner than later.